Work? Passion?

Assalamualaikum.

Ramadhan Kareem everyone!

Alhamdulillah, we are blessed to meet Ramadhan again this year.

This year, Ramadhan hits me differently. The vibe. Too many positive vibes even since before this Ramadhan starts. I have a long list of prayers and wishes that I hope I can achieve. Some of them are to perform my prayers early, to learn how to cook, etc. Above all else, to become a better person every single day.

Few days before Ramadhan, I had a great conversation with my boss. I had to stop working due to the financial crisis during MCO. It was legit. I feel extremely good because this is what I actually wanted since a long time ago. These past few months, I felt stress and it did affect my work. Every morning, I had to push myself to wake up and get up from the bed. I even felt that working is troublesome to the point that I constantly do my research about Master's Degree because I do not want to work anymore. 

Allah knows best. Perfect timing. In four days, I'll be free. I will no longer have to be so nervous about coming to work. I will no longer have to think on what things will my boss be mad at me, what trouble will I cause my boss today and most importantly, I will no longer have to think about quitting my job every day. 

I know that it is difficult to find a job right now. Especially for a fresh graduate. Plus, MCO. But, when I do some flashbacks to my every day life at work, I do not feel bad at all. It is important for every employee to work in an environment that can make them feel at ease coming to work everyday.

I watched many videos regarding "Work versus Passion", "Passion versus Reality" and "Do what you love versus Do what you earn". Their opinions are very subjective. From my point of view, their words will hit people differently. This is because everyone is living in their own world. And we do not know what is in their mind, what is in their heart. Some say, I want to do what I love. I don't care about not earning much. When I do what I love, I'll be satisfied. But some say, I don't care about my passion, I want to earn so much money so I can spend them the way I want. Right?

Prof Dr Muhaya once said, "The God Almighty has placed me in this place, for me to do my Khalifah's rule to give benefit". Remember to place in our hearts that we come to work everyday NOT TO EARN but to contribute and to develop growth. These should be our mindset. If we keep having negative mindset about our job or probably because of the environment, change job. If we cannot change job, what we can do is to change our mindset, perception and beliefs. So true. I agree. It's just that I'm not tough enough to even change my mindset. I'm like a glass. Very fragile.

Terri Trespicio said that "passion is not a plan, it's a feeling. And feelings change". True as well. I thought I have a passion for my current position. Well, it is quite different from my major. But I am no longer into it. Back in 2013, I thought I have a passion for accounting but I lost it. In 2017, I changed my major to Human Resource and I did well. Surprisingly excellent. Not my passion tho. So now, I need to stop following my so-called passion and try to venture into any opportunities available. Terri also said "the most fulfilling careers are those that still have the power to surprise you". So why not? Let's hope for more surprises!

It is nice to watch motivational videos in this blessed month. I am relieved that I can finally put away all the worries I had about the negativity at work. I will constantly pray for more 'surprises' regarding the jobs and inshaAllah, I'm hoping for zero negativity in my future job. For now, I want to have a long rest and will constantly apply for jobs in the future. Please pray the best for me yaa :)